You might not be out of office, but I'd say you're out of something alright...

"Good afternoon, IT-helpdesk, this is Anne speaking."
"Good afternoon, this is Onet Rackmind. Can you tell me how to put an automatic reply up for an email adress?"
"Of course! You can just use an out of office reply for that! In outlook, you go to file and click Automatic Reply (Out of Office), which you can find-"
"No, I don't mean an out of office message, I'm not going away or anything, it needs to be an automatic reply."
"They're the same thing ma'am."
"No no, that's for when you're going away! Out of Office, see? I need an automatic reply!"
"You can edit the message however you want, so it can be either."
"I said I didn't want an out of office! I'm not going to be away! I'm looking for an automatic reply function. You know, so whenever someone emails us they get a message that we received their email and they will get a reply within two workweeks!"

At this point I gave up on her.

"There, found it! You just go to file in the top left corner of your outlook screen and press Automatic Reply. You can then enter whatever message you want. "
"Yes! That's what I was looking for! Thank you!"